My trip to the opticians confirmed what I had always suspected. I am, in fact, superhuman. I am short-sighted in my left eye, and long-sighted in my right eye. In this way, like Ivor Cutler, I can use my left to see insects and bacterias, and with my right I can see the stars and the nebulas.
Sadly, the optician is an evil optician and, jealous of these incredible powers, she has prescribed me glasses.